and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Do vagina's smell?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
