in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
