This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
