Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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