Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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