Christians are straight up FREAKS
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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