are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He felt like a one man threesome
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
