Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
