good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
