just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
