'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
