you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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