I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
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