he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
