im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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