U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
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i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
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I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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