I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize
