Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
