I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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