I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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