My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize