He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Randomize
