He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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