He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
