Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
