don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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