just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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