When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
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I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is classic penis vs brain.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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