and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I am one with the molecules
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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