Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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