This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
