I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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