OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
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At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
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Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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