Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
