This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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