I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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