we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
