HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
