Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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