Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
