whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
