They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
