What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
