I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
