I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
