Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
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