so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
In America we eat man semen.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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