Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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