She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
