if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
