Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
