I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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