is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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