I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
